READ THIS :D

you know a song is over played When your mom knows all the lyrics..

We met, we talked, we liked, we called, we texted, we dated, we committed, I loved, you cheated, we're done, you're deleted, I'm good!

This is how my week goes: Mooooonnnnnddaaaaaaaaay Tueeeesssdaaaaaaayyyyy Weeedddnnnesssdayyyyy Thursssssdaaaaaaaayyyyy FridaySaturdaySunday.

We live in a world where losing your iPhone is more dramatic than losing your virginity.

*Walks upstairs.* "Why am I up here?!" *Walks downstairs.* "Oh now I remember... Shit."

Oh look, you're giving my middle finger a boner.

I'm mad for: always being nice, apologizing when I didn't do anything wrong, getting attached, & for making you a HUGE part of my life. -_-

there is no "I" in "team" but there is 3 U's in SHUT THE FUCK UP.

"I'm bringing sexy back!" ....bitch you're the reason it LEFT!

"Dude that song is old." "So is your mom, but you still listen to her."

The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.

"dammit I'm mad" spelled backwards is "dammit I'm mad."

That attractive face you pull; before you sneeze.

Dear Face Wash Commercials, Nobody Actually Splashes Their Face With Water Like That. Sincerely, my whole damn bathroom floor is wet -.-

Me a nerd? Haha no, I'm just making sure not to end up working with you at McDonalds.

In every circle of friends there's always that one person everyone secretly hates. Don't have one? Then it's probably you.

someone just texted me and asked "what does idk stand for? " i said " i dont know" she said "omg! nobody does!"

What starts with F and ends with UCK? THATS RIGHT! FIRETRUCK. Well what starts with P and ends with ORN? Thats Right Popcorn!

The 3 most common lies on the internet: 1) I have read and agreed to the terms of service. 2) Status: Offline. 3) I am over 18.

Lazy Rule 1436300228452: You didn't read all the numbers.

So I'm invisible to you now? That's cool. I've always wanted a superpower.

Instead of "lol" I put "lsimhbiwfefmtalol" Laughing silently in my head because it wasn't funny enough for me to actually laugh out loud

i was reading this stuff on twitter. made my day bright again :)